Why am I sending this letter to you? I know that most of you are Democrats and would never vote for someone like Donald Trump. But there may be a few Republicans who will receive this. I deeply hope that you will read it. If each of us can change one vote we can win this election. I also ask that all of you who are voting for Hillary to take one person with you to cast a vote for her.

Everything depends on us. I mean the us that can’t bear the thought of a racist in our highest office. The us that knows we are all the same no matter where we were born or whether we are poor, middle class, wealthy, black, Hispanic or any color combination. What difference is there when we laugh, are in pain, when we weep, when our children excel, when we lose a parent or a child. We cannot afford anyone in office to think, talk and act the way Trump’s supporters do.

They speak of deportation, sending Hillary to prison, even executing her. Will someone please tell me how this kind of thinking became acceptable?

In the 80’s I lived in Georgia for 10 years and it took me over 3 of those years to see the underbelly of this God fearing, flag waving segment of our country. Racism touched everything, from voting rights to schools.

Years later – 2016 – look at us now: we are seeing the racism that lives like a giant suppurating fungus spread across America.

Why does it matter so much? Ask all of Europe, ask Mexico and Central America. I wish we could hear from Martin Luther King today. Trump demeaned black Americans by insulting their culture and urging them to vote for him. He asked “what have you got to lose?” There is only one answer – everything.

We will lose the world’s respect, our freedom of the press, our economy, the future of our children – whatever you hold dear – unless you are a fascist fellow traveler, you will lose your most basic rights.

Many will find health insurance too costly. Government programs that help large numbers of us will be under assault. I cannot bear to think of the government appointments that Trump ( the world’s oldest living toddler) will make.

The cost to all of us is bigger than we can imagine. This cost is greater than any economy. The cost is our empathy, our kindness, our commitment to honesty, our willingness to help, and the things that we have stood for all over the world.

What is at stake –

Civil liberties and equal rights

Women’s rights

Minimum wage increase

Family leave for medical needs


Environment and energy

College loans

Education for all

Repeal of Citizens United


The most important reason of all to elect Hillary Clinton is

The Supreme Court

We must stop Trump. Everything is at stake.


Alzheimer’s 101


Early, 1 or 2 in the morning, my husband leaves the bed for the bathroom and then I hear the closet door open. I call him and the closet light goes on(when this happens my brain says – morning and I’m up). Next, light off and he goes across to the bathroom from his closet. He returns to bed to get up an hour later to try to leave our bedroom by opening the closed double doors to the hall. Solve that and he makes it to the bathroom.

In the bathroom we have a night light next to the sinks, a light that lights up the toilet area and another mounted outside the toilet that lights up the entire bowl. These are both motion sensitive and stay on about a minute. Thank you, Amazon.

Every morning for over 40 years, we have had tea, read the newspaper and have breakfast. The grapes cannot be found although they are in their usual place. We eat a cereal for breakfast so no stove involved except for early morning herbal tea. It is good for Bill to make his breakfast – he feels enough loss about so much. He wants to be useful and as much as possible it is a good idea.

Coffee, always a ritual, just not first thing anymore. Around nine we make coffee in the Chemex ritual. Yes, we have had coffee makers but no more. Neither of us like those little pouch things made in a computer like gadget. So, we are coffee snobs and probably food snobs too. I am glad I only make lunch and dinner. I really love to cook but not breakfast. At 78, I have cooked a lot. Cooking was and is my stress reducer. Get frazzled, annoyed, worrying as we all do, and my advice is go to the kitchen, that is, if you love cooking. Use that time to decompress. Making a meal can be a form of meditation.

Mid morning, errands, grocery store. I can no longer send Bill for items in the stores, as he can’t remember which organic milk to choose or where to find the onions. This is the problem as it is with washing dishes, sorting mail or many things that were almost automatic, now, hard to find words and actions that match up.

He wants to help, I want him to help. But the ability to wash a dish or remember to finish the dishes is fast disappearing.

I started writing this to go through a whole day but I have lost the mind for it, lost the heart for it and worse lost the humor in it.

Each day is much the same, food, a walk, dog adoration and a repeat of so many things. I know as we age our days become routine and we cling to the familiar. Now, it isn’t that I mind the routine for I have created much of it as I love order and doing things in a way that makes sense (to me.)

I am a stranger in this Alzheimer’s land and so is my husband. Who knew? Who would want to know? Each day I see him lose more and I see myself struggling to stay focused, do some kind of work every day as that makes it all easier to handle. I have always needed a sense of accomplishment and seldom more than I now need it, no it is a necessity. I need to feel that I am keeping up with the house, the dog, the myriad of detail that is now my responsibility. For Bill, I don’t think he now notices his losses as much as he did a month ago. He does something, loses something, asks for help but I don’t think he worries. Maybe for a moment but it is all moments.

I value the moments when we have a conversation that lasts a bit. Often, we are talking but then we are in some off the subject conversation that doesn’t relate and I know he has drifted off.

Learning, I am learning as his experiences decline, learning to be the one thing I have avoided – to be patient. And where I am right now, as a woman, mother, wife, caregiver, sometime Buddhist and friend in this situation, I am learning that to be sane and capable I have to be in the moment. And to stay out of the 4 a.m. thoughts such as – what if? how will I? when can I find time to?

The Rolling Stones said it best, you don’t always get what you want………

What I have lacked in my life is patience and I am now enrolled in Patience 101.